


Too Much to Ask

by Tahlruil



Series: After the End [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Irritated Steve Rogers, Jealous Steve, M/M, Mildly Steve Rogers Critical, Mostly Canon Compliant, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Pre-Slash, Steve Can Be a Jerk, Steve Doesn't Know He's Pining, Steve Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Reality Check, Steve Rogers-centric, Steve Wants His Team Back
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-05
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-09-14 21:59:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9205004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tahlruil/pseuds/Tahlruil
Summary: Steve couldn't be happier - Bucky's back, he's on the Avengers again, and everything can finally go back to normal. Though he wishes the Avengers - mostly Tony - would stop making him jump through hoops just so he can be team leader again. And who invited these kids onto the team anyway? The Accords are still too limiting, but he can work with them for now. He knows it's only a matter of time before the rest of the world sees it the way he does. Bucky seems to be having a bit of an identity crisis, but Steve doesn't mind; he's with Buck 'til the end of the line, so he can weather this minor storm. And sure, Tony won't let him into the workshop or even really talk to him anymore, but that can't last forever either - soon he'll be able to admit that Steve was right, and things will be like they were before.... but is it too much to ask that it happens soon?





	

**Author's Note:**

> For real, all you guys who commented and bookmarked and gave kudos on the last installment - you're awesome, and I adore you all. <3 You got me all excited about this series, and it's taken over my brain... but I guess that's okay for a little while. <3
> 
> This series doesn't necessarily have a clearly defined plot - it's mostly just vignettes pulled from the lives of the Avengers as they come back together after the end. So please forgive any meandering, or scenes that don't seem to have much of a point! I'll try not to do too much of either. XD
> 
> For Steve's first piece, I wanted to look at his current relationship with the Avengers, Bucky, and Tony. I hope it doesn't disappoint! I have a short, fluffy thing that'll come next and miiiight even be up tonight. Or tomorrow, if I can't get the kinks ironed out. 
> 
> Again, thanks so much for the support! Please, please keep commenting! I don't mind constructive criticisms or suggestions, and seeing comments makes me squeal and do little happy dances, and it's awesome. XD Thanks! <3

“But if I went in with Sam, Nat and Wanda we could have the whole cell destroyed in less ti-”

“So do you not listen when Captain Marvel talks, or is it _yourself_ that you’re not hearing?”

“Thank you, Spider-Man, but I’m perfectly capable of handling this.”

“Sorry. Mostly. I guess?” Steve eyed the costumed teen with a growing amount of dislike as he verbally waffled. Sure the kid had some spunk and the kind of signature New York City can-do-attitude that Steve could appreciate, but he was also extremely irritating. He messed around almost as much as Tony, and the new team almost never called him on it. Not only that, but he couldn’t even join them on the field to make up for all his faults; it made Steve wonder if this whole training program the New Avengers had set up for younger heroes was really worth it. When Spider-Man waggled his fingers at him in a parody of a wave, Steve snorted in disgust and turned his attention back to the woman sitting across the table from him.

“Like I was saying, Carol-”

“Captain Marvel!”

“… excuse me?”

“In meetings we use our super-names! Remember?” Kamala at least wasn’t as grating as Spider-Man, but she still inserted herself into his business far too often. She was only a kid, but she seemed to think she had the right to correct him – in his day, youngsters knew how to show _respect_. “So Spider-Man doesn’t feel weird being the only one with a secret identity.” The girl was obsessed with making sure no one felt ‘weird’; when Spider-Man was around, she even went so far as to wear her costume constantly so the boy didn’t stick out quite so much. “So for now it’s Captain Marvel, Cap!”

“Fine. Whatever. The **_point_** ,” fuck, he missed being team leader. Meetings had never gotten out of hand like this when he was running them. But he would show them all he could play their game – he would. Then, when this stupid ‘test’ was over, they’d be able to admit he belonged in charge without damaging their fragile egos. He just had to hold on until then. “The point, Captain Marvel, is that it doesn’t make sense for me to go in as an advisor. Not when I could take out enemy operations with ease without the national army being anywhere near the place. Just seems like we’re putting a lot of lives on the line for no good reason, ma’am.”

Despite his irritation with the whole situation, he did his best to keep his voice even and respectful. He didn’t mind taking orders from a dame, and he wouldn’t give anyone an excuse to claim otherwise. Tony would enjoy it too much, would delight in pointing out that his ‘40s sensibilities’ were getting in the way of him being a team player. He wasn’t going to give Tony the satisfaction, and he was going to see this through.

Even if she often looked at him in a slow, assessing way that made him feel like snarling.

“That may be your opinion, Captain America, but we were specifically called in to fill an advisory role. I had planned on sending Vision, but Rho- War Machine,” she interrupted herself before Kamala could, sending the girl a warm smile. “Suggested I tap you. You have a good grasp of tactics, and if things go to hell despite the army’s best efforts, you’ll be able to handle yourself.”

“But why can’t I just take a team and deal with the threat?”

That slow, careful look again, and Steve _hated_ it. Carol Danvers was alright, really, and he would have loved it if she’d been on the Avengers back when he was at the helm. She was calm in a crisis, respected the chain of command, and packed a helluva punch. The problem was that she was a bit too hesitant as a leader, in his opinion, too careful in a way that endangered them all instead of helping the situation. She was Tony’s exact opposite in many ways, and yet had the same _look_ in her eyes as his sadly misguided friend when she met his gaze. It was a look that suggested she thought he was an idiot, and was trying to come up with a tactful way of letting him know that.

At least she was better than Tony at not being insulting when she spoke to him.

“This is a complicated matter, Captain America, and rushing in is the last thing we want to do. There is still a chance at a peaceful resolution,” she mostly ignored the scoffing sound that Steve couldn’t help but let out, though the skin around her eyes went a bit tighter. “And we’re going to do _everything we can_ to facilitate that. Sending an advisor means we’re taking the matter seriously, and both sides will know that the eyes of the world are on them. That’s the goal here, Captain. Not every group of rebels are terrorists-”

“Besides, isn’t ‘government bad’ kind of your mantra now? Shouldn’t you be like, encouraging us to help the ones hiding in caves take out the ‘corrupt army’?”

“Take a lap, Spider-Man.” _Finally_. Carol’s voice was full of iron as she delivered the punishment, drawing an approving nod from Steve. Kamala looked distressed, her eyes flicking between the three of them quickly as she chewed her lower lip. The teen in question didn’t seem too perturbed, only shrugged and – because he was learning all of Tony’s best showboat techniques – used his webbing to ‘sling and swing’ his way out of the room to do the lap demanded of him.

“Any more interruptions will result in team building exercises instead of training sessions until I’m convinced we’ve all learned to respect each other.” The mild words were a threat more than anything, because team building with the Avengers _sucked_ and they all knew it. Well, apart from Kamala, who looked disturbingly eager until Nat managed to catch her eye and level an extremely pointed arched brow in her direction. Carol waited a moment to see if anyone would voice any objections, but the junior smartass was gone and Smartass Sr. almost never showed for the meetings, so it was quiet. “Alright then.”

She paused to gather the threads of the interrupted conversation, nodded, and began to speak again. “This may very well still end in civil war, and if that is the case, we will _not_ be involved. As per the New Accords – which you _signed_ , Captain, so you can put the glare away – the Avengers will not take sides in such conflicts. We are going in now only to advise the national army on how best to defend their civilians should negotiations fall through, and to show that the UN has eyes on the situation.”

“But if we know the rebels are targeting civilian areas, we should just take them out! There’s no reason to put innocents in danger like this.”

“… Captain, did you read the _full_ briefing I sent to you last night?” That look again, and now Carol sounded tired, like speaking to him was some great battle.

“Most of it.” Partly true – he’d only really needed to read the first two pages for the situation to become clear. Why an additional ten had been tacked on he didn’t understand; privately, he suspected ‘modern’ folk of wanting to make things as overly complicated as possible.

“Right. Vision, did you read the entirety?”

“Indeed, Captain Marvel. I also did a bit of reading to further my understanding of the root cause of the conflict – it’s fascinating, though also quite tragic.” The expression in Wanda’s eyes as she watched Vision, who always sat as far away from her as he could manage, was tragic. This conflict and the proposed ‘resolution’ was just stupid.

“Then I’m handing this assignment back over to you. You and I, Captain, will meet at some point this week to revisit the expectations and duties we Avengers are to fulfill under the New Accords. The rest of you are welcome to attend if you would like a refresher or have any questions.” Feeling himself go red in the face, Steve bit his tongue to keep from talking – whatever he said next wouldn’t be pretty or helpful to the situation.

“I’d be interested in that,” Sam piped up, surprising Steve and earning him a betrayed glance from Clint. “Some of the stuff regarding humanitarian aid still isn’t making sense to me.” Steve’s frustration and the beginnings of fury were replaced completely by shock when Carol sent him the same warm, fond smile she often directed at Kamala.

“I know, and I agree with many of the points you’ve raised, Falcon. If those are your only concerns, I think you can skip the meeting. The next point of business in this meeting was to ask if you wanted to help me write out an amendment proposal for the next meeting with the UN.”

“Sounds great.”

“Fantastic. I’ll look over my schedule and let you know when I’m available to discuss that in depth. I’ll also send out notifications on when the general meeting to review the New Accords will take place. Captain America, you _will_ be in attendance, and I would highly recommend that the rest of your team think about joining us.”

God, again with the Accords, always the Accords. Limiting them and forcing them into impossible situations, tying their hands when they needed to be able to act. These new ones were only a little better than the old ones, and he just knew that people were going to get hurt because they followed them.

When that happened, he hoped Tony would feel real proud of himself for standing behind them.

~.~.~

“Bucky, have you-” The most obnoxious buzzer sound he’d ever heard sounded loudly, making Steve’s jaw clench. The regular lights turned off for precisely five seconds, and the red emergency lights began to flash in their absence. Once things went back to normal, FRIDAY’s interference stopping for the moment, he forced himself to take a deep breath and counted to ten before starting over.

“ _James_ ,” Jesus Christ, why had he left his best friend here to the tender mercies of Tony and his spiteful AI? “Have you given any more thought to moving to the compound?” It was a question he always asked at the beginning and ending of every visit. He NEEDED Bucky to understand how much Steve wanted him to be there. He needed his best friend to know how much Steve wanted him back on his team, like he’d always been. He wanted Bucky back, so it could be like it had been before.

“Not really, Stevie. Being an Avenger… I don’t know if that’s what I want. And I like it here.”

"But Bu- James,” he corrected quickly, sending a baleful glance to the ceiling. “You don’t _have_ to be a full-time Avenger to live there. Or do any Avenging at all, if you’re not ready yet. I already cleared it with Carol and Colonel Rhodes – you can move in whenever you’re ready.”

If Steve didn’t know better, he’d think the frown Bucky was wearing was directed at him.

“Why would you do that?”

“… well, you said you weren’t sure a non-Avenger could live on the compound. So I made sure you could.”

“What I _said_ was that I didn’t _want_ to live on the compound _unless_ I was an Avenger. I don’t know that I want to be one.” Panic, hot and suffocating, flared up in his chest. Why would Bucky be saying that? They’d talked about this, and how Steve wanted him on the team, and Bucky had wanted it then.

“Buck- god _dammit_ FRIDAY!” Snapping at the AI was maybe not the best reaction, but he couldn’t help it. If the buzzer and the lights didn’t stop, he was going to go _crazy_. And what right did the AI have to listen in on their private conversations anyway? “Will you cut that out already?!”

“Sergeant Barnes has made a rather simple request of you,” FRIDAY returned in a snotty tone… only after the light and sound show was over, of course. “Since you can’t seem to remember it on your own, I’ve taken it upon myself to help. You don’t need to thank me.”

“Did Tony put you up to this?” Bucky had been smiling – he always did like watching a worked-up Steve put bullies in his place, and FRIDAY was being a bully. Now though, his expression shifted to a dark frown, and a horrible thought occurred to him. “Bu… James.” God, he’d hoped to be done with this careful, gentle voice. He wanted his friend back, wanted him better, so he didn’t always feel like he was walking on eggs whenever they had to have a hard conversation. “Tony isn’t telling you that you don’t deserve to be an Avenger, is he?” His friend’s hands clenched, which was all Steve needed to know his theory was correct. “Because you do, Bu-James. You deserve it _so_ much. You’re a hero, and I hate that you aren’t on the team with the rest of us. Don’t let Tony take that away from you. He just… he’s upset with me about his parents, but he can’t just-”

“Tony,” Bucky started, his voice holding a low, dangerous note that had Steve growing a bit more alert. If the Winter Soldier took over again, things would go south quick – it would be all the justification Tony needed to try and kill Bucky again. And since when did Bucky use ‘Tony’ instead of ‘Stark’? Something was going on here, and it had a terrible feeling twisting around in his stomach. “Hasn’t said anything like that Stevie. If I wanted to be an Avenger, he’d have me geared up in a heartbeat – I think he’s been working on stuff for me for a while now, actually.”

“If he’d just let me in the workshop,” Steve muttered, another flash of irritation running through him. Who knew what the idiot genius was working on down there? He needed… he needed to go down there and watch Tony work. Just to make _sure_ he wasn’t doing anything wrong, especially if he was doing anything related to Bucky.

“He doesn’t want you in the workshop, and you should respect that.” Bucky hadn’t snapped at him like this in… well, not since the 40s, and Steve wasn’t sure if he was glad to see the flash of personality or hurt at the tone of his voice. “Tony doesn’t hafta let _anyone_ in if he don’t want to, so stop ridin’ him about it. He didn’t ask Friday to razz you ‘bout forgettin’ my name either. He wouldn’t, and if I asked he’d get ‘er to stop. But I guess it’s the first time she’s shown any real initiative, growin’ outta what he programmed ‘er to be, and he’s real proud. So I don’t want her to stop. I think it’s kinda funny, and you would to if you weren’t bein’ so stupid about the whole thing. So stop yellin’ at her.”

“B… James!”

“And another thing,” Bucky continued as if Steve hadn’t tried to interrupt him, glaring now, his hands still clenched into fists. “Askin’ to be called ‘James’ was my fucking idea. Didn’t have nothin’ to do with Tony or FRIDAY at all. It’s what _I_ want. So if you could just _do it_ for me, I’d really fucking appreciate it. Nobody else has any trouble rememberin’, so I think you can manage it too, punk. FRIDAY shouldn’t hafta flash lights at you b’fore you switch from Bucky.” By the end of his rant, the man in question was breathing hard, as if he’d just run a marathon, and Steve felt like an ass. He’d upset his friend – his best friend, his brother – and he really hadn’t meant to do that. If… if Bucky didn’t feel up to reclaiming his name just yet that was fine; he’d get there eventually.

He could call him James in the meantime.

“I’m sorry,” he offered, voice contrite. “I… I wasn’t thinking about how you might be feeling about your name. FRIDAY can stop with the lights, ‘cause I’m going to remember on my own from now on. I promise.”

Steve watched as the tension drained from Bucky’s form and smiled warmly, glad to see it. “Yeah. Okay. Thanks Stevie.”

“I’d do anything for you, ya jerk.”

“… I know that, you stupid punk. I know that.”

“Good. Wanna order pizza and watch a movie?”

“Yeah, sounds good. Hey FRIDAY? Could you ask Tony if he’s got plans for dinner? I can put some pizza in the fridge for him to grab later if he doesn’t. And if he asks me to and he doesn’t fucking eat it, or he says he has plans and I find out later he didn’t eat anything, I’ll kick his ass. I _know_ he skipped lunch today.” What? Why would Bucky know that? And why would he care? Everyone knew Tony skipped meals all the time – he lived on snacks and those awful shakes. Even Steve had given up trying to bring him food to the workshop. Back when he’d been allowed _in_ the workshop, anyway.

“Boss asks me to remind you that he is a, quote, 'grown ass man', and you can’t force him to eat regular meals.” Bucky made a rather complex face at that, one that seemed aimed at one of Friday’s cameras for her to transmit to the genius billionaire. The look conveyed irritation, fondness, a healthy dose of guilt-inducing sorrow and a threat all in one – he remembered when _he_ used to get that look whenever he was doing something Bucky’d deemed stupid. God he missed that look, and he felt a white-hot flash of jealousy shoot through him. Problem was, he wasn’t sure if he was jealous of Tony or Bucky, especially when FRIDAY spoke again. “Boss would like you to put the eyes away, Sergeant, and save him a few slices of pizza. He’ll come up and get them once he’s reached a stopping point in his current project.” Before Bucky could even open his mouth, she was continuing. “He promises that will happen before the clock hits midnight.”

“Fine then.” Bucky looked so smug and pleased with himself as he gave the AI their order and asked her to call it in for them. It was… it was something. Something that he really, really didn’t like. With just a few sentences and a stupid face, he’d gotten Tony to promise to eat. He’d almost never done that for Steve, especially after Tony had made all those stupid mistakes with Ultron. Why was he eating for Bucky?

There was something going on here, and even if Steve wasn’t sure what it was, he knew that he didn’t like it. He was going to have to figure it out and then put a stop to it. Not because he was jealous, of course – he was a better leader than that. No, he just… he just had to look out for Bucky. So he’d monitor the situation, and get his best friend out of the tower just as soon as he could manage.

Later, when Wanda asked what movie they’d put on, he realized he hadn’t the slightest idea.

He’d been too unsettled to actually watch it.

~.~.~

“TONY!”

It took everything Steve possessed not to swear at Kamala, because she’d _shrieked_ the genius’ name right in his ear. Even before the serum, when he’d been half-deaf, that would have been enough to hurt. She was only a kid though – an overbearing, overexcited, interfering one, but a kid nonetheless. Later on, he’d take her aside and explain, then ask her to try and not do that anymore. For the moment though, he just winced and then watched her shoot up from the couch, bouncing her way over to Tony Stark like he was just another person.

He didn’t _look_ like a regular Joe though, not with that tailored suit and those irritatingly bright sunglasses. Tony looked good – he always looked good, everyone _knew_ he looked good – but why did he have to be so obnoxious about it? Why couldn’t he just come to the compound in jeans and a t-shirt? It seemed like these days he only ever saw Tony with his eyes hidden and his body covered in fabric; he sort of missed the more casual Tony, the one who wore tank tops and didn’t mind that his hair was messed up and full of engine grease.

But Tony had changed, sucking up to the US government and creeps like Ross. He probably felt like the New Avengers were beneath him. That was why he always dressed this way around them now.

At least he wasn’t cruel enough to let those thoughts show, and was pretending to like Kamala. He was shooting her one of his brightest smiles, and when she threw her arms around his waist in a hug, the man hesitated for only a moment before returning it. 

“Mr. Stark!” Spider-Man had been all the way in the kitchen, helping Vision make them all lunch – the android did better when assisted by someone who could actually taste what he was making. The boy had abandoned the task, because he was irresponsible and excitable, and was able to reach Tony only a heartbeat after Kamala by virtue of using his webslinging abilities. Which _should_ be limited to the field, but no one listened to him about _that_. He suspected that once Col. Rhodes forgot that he’d been the one to suggest it, Spider-Man would find himself far more limited than he was currently.

“Woah there, Spiderling,” Tony protested as the kid joined in the hug a little enthusiastically, almost sending them all to the floor. There was laughter in the man’s voice though, so it wasn’t really a scold and they all knew it; his glasses had been knocked off, and Steve could make out every wrinkle around his eyes that showed off how _happy_ he was in that moment. It was… it was nice. But also irritating, because why couldn’t he smile at him that way, or any of their other friends? Why only Kamala and Spider-Man?

It was so unfair of Tony to split the team like this, especially since he was just barely on it himself.

“I thought you weren’t coming until tomorrow, Mr. Stark!”

“Tony. Jesus kid, I’ve asked you at least a hundred times. Call me Tony.”

“Tony! Tony! Guess what?”

“What’s up, kiddo?”

“I got a B on that chemistry paper you helped me with! Thank you soooo much!”

“Good! I was worried. Chemistry is pretty fucking close to a squishy science-”

“Language!” For Christ’s sake, they were kids! Why was Tony swearing?”

“So it’s not really my forte.” Tony continued as if Steve hadn’t interrupted. If anything, he was talking louder just to spite him. “I mean, _high school_ chemistry is a piece of cake, but I wasn’t sure I could explain it in a way that made sense to you.” Had Tony just called her stupid? Kamala was a bit annoying, but she was anything but dumb. Steve bristled in her defense, ready to intercede… only to realize that the girl didn’t seem insulted at all. In fact, she was beaming at the man even _brighter_ than before.

“No, no! It was super helpful. Thanks sooooo much for looking into all that other stuff so you could talk about it in a way my brain wasn’t all like ‘grrr’ at. You were right, relating it to something I like better worked! Are you staying for dinner? Can we work on my math home-”

“Mr. S… Tony. You didn’t answer my question. And I thought _I_ was helping you with your math?”

“Well yeah, but if Tony’s _right here_ and all, then we should-”

“I’m great at math! And science! We shouldn’t bother Tony with that stuff. And anyway, he’s probably here for something important, because he wasn’t supposed to be here until _tomorrow_ , so let’s find out why before we talk about homework, okay? … will you help me with my Spanish later though Kamala?”

“I guess? I suck at it too, you know.”

“Yeah, but at least if we’re both doing it, we can talk out loud without sounding dumb. My aunt teases me about it if I do it at home.”

“Haha! Yeah, sure thing Spider-Boy!”

“It’s Spider- _Man_!”

“Can I call a time-out? I’m calling a time-out. Grown-up talk time, okay?” Tony was watching the two kids with obvious fondness, and Steve felt that tight sense of regret in his chest again, one that quickly turned to irritation. He hardly _knew_ those kids! Why was he already treating them better than he’d treated the team? “My young spider padawan, I was here to talk to the royal pussycat-”

“What did you need to see T’Challa about?” Steve asked, feeling his jaw clench when Tony looked over and his eyes immediately lost several degrees of warmth. That was maybe a _little bit_ his own fault – he hadn’t meant to sound so suspicious. But Tony really couldn’t blame him for that either! Not with his track record.

“I needed his opinion on his favorite kind of kitty litter.”

“There’s no need to be rude, Tony.”

“Well then, not to be rude, but it really is none of your fucking business, so butt out.”

“Tony,”

“Oh no. Don’t you take that ‘you wear me out whem you’re being unreasonable’ tone with me, _Steven_. Only Pep is allowed to use that tone anymore. Besides, I didn’t come here to fight with you. I came to see Mufasa and check in on my two favorite baby Avengers.”

“We’re not _babies_ just because we’re the youngest Avengers, Tony, god.”

“Uh, excuse me? None of you newbies has been an Avenger for more than two years. Haven’t even managed to save the world _once_. You know how long it took me to get around to saving the world after I joined the team? Like, a day. You’d all be terrible grown-up Avengers. You, Spider-Brat, Carol, Hope, Scott… babies. Hell, even Rhodey and Vision are only toddlers, and that’s ONLY because they helped save the world once. You’re a baby, Kamala. Embrace it. Be thankful for it. Carrying the weight of the world isn’t exactly my idea of fun times.”

“Liar.”

“Okay, the flying around and shooting shit is _awesome_. It’s the rest of it that sucks ass.”

“Tony! Watch your words!”

“ _Make me_ , Cap. They aren’t actual babies, just baby _Avengers_. They can handle a few naughty words.”

“We really can.”

“Yeah. We’re not THAT little. When we’re 18, let’s make our own team, Spider-Boy. We can get away from all these old fogeys that act like we’re dumb kids.”

“Can I-”

“No.”

“You don’t even know what I was gonna ask!”

“You’re not naming our team.”

“Why noooot?”

“Because you have vaguely spider-ish powers and you named yourself ‘Spider-Man’. Like, ew. How obvious can you get?”

“Because ‘Ms. Marvel’ is soooooo much better.”

“Okay! Remember our time-out? For grown-up talking time? I never actually ended that, so shush. God, you both make me feel fucking _old_.”

“Well, you _are_ getting up there in years, and-”

“I know where you live, Spider-Brat. Now zip it.”

“Zipped, sir.”

“Uh-huh.”

“No really! I won’t say another word. My lips are sealed.”

“Right.”

“You don’t believe me? Kamala, why doesn’t he believe me?”

With a long suffering sigh and sparkling brown eyes, Tony shook his head and seemed to decide he’d better just get on with it. Probably a good decision, because Steve knew from experience Spider-Man was as bad at shutting up as Tony was.

“Look, I gotta get back to the tower pretty quick. James is making some stupid new thing for dinner – spinach puff balls or something? Fuck, they sound annoying as hell, and if they don’t turn out right he and FRIDAY are going to be sniping at each other about the recipe and what he did wrong and what she ‘forgot’ to tell him to do all goddamn night. But if I’m not there to take part in the madness, I’ll have both of them on _my_ ass, and I can’t allow that. They’re irritating, and they’ll lock me out of my workshop to bitch at me if I try to escape there. So I need to be out of here in the next five minutes.”

As Tony talked, Steve felt jealously flaring up in him again – once the fire of it had burned out though, he just felt empty and cold. God, Tony had hardly looked at him this whole time, but he was babbling and smiling to the two teens that grated so heavily on his own nerves sometimes. He was going home to Bucky, where it sounded like they had an actual evening planned, with food and talking and… and warmth. He’d thought Tony _hated_ Bucky, but it sounded like they were friends, maybe even better friends than Tony was with him.

Which really only showed how stupid Tony had been being in Siberia. _See?_ , he wanted to shout. _It wasn’t Bucky, it was the monster they put inside of him and you were wrong! I had to do it, Tony. I had to stop you!_ But the words always got caught in his throat, and they weren’t any of Kamala or Spider-Man’s business anyway.

What had happened in that bunker was between Steve, Tony and Bucky.

No one else needed to know.

Not ever.

“I’m not dropping by tomorrow either – I have to fly out to Malibu for the night to see Pepper and sign some paperwork that she refuses to fax to me. I told her she should just forge my signature, but she’s a party-poop and refused. But, uh – look.” Suddenly, Tony seemed nervous, and Steve had to fight to repress a resigned groan. God, _now_ what had he done, and was he really going to try to make these kids clean up his mess?! “You um, you’re both. You know. Not _terrible_. For baby Avengers. Or Avengers in general, I guess. I mean, you irritate me less than the usual person. So I thought… ah. I know you like science, Spiderling, so I thought… and since Kamala is all bubbly and always asks about it… uh… and since I, you know, mostly hate you less than other people…”

Suddenly Kamala had him wrapped up in another hug, and the expression on her face was sweet and encouraging. “We like you too, Tony. So spit it out already, before we’re as old as you.”

“You are an irritating brat,” the man replied instantly, rolling his eyes. “Ugh. I should take it back, but since I haven’t offered yet I guess that wouldn’t be fair. But once you say yes, I’m revoking the offer. Just a warning.”

“Mr. St- Tony. Tony Tony Tony. Tony. That’s… it’s so weird that I get to say that. Tony. I mean, you’re all smart and suave and rich and stuff, and I’m just a little nobody. Tony. Uh. Anyway. What are you asking us?”

“You’re as hopeless as she is. But, uh. I’m, you know. Not much better really. Uh. So. I made these for you.” Disentangling himself from Kamala, Tony reached into his suit pocket and pulled out what looked like two ID cards of some kind. “… wanna come hang out in my workshop with me?”

Steve froze, and then felt his world begin to crumble.

Distantly, he heard Spider-Man and Kamala begin to squeal and shout in excitement. Before his glazed, mostly un-seeing eyes, they dog-piled the older man, this time knocking him to the floor in truth. The teens were so excited, so eager, and Tony had lost his nervousness as well from what Steve could process later. They made plans, and Tony explained the badges he’d made for the pair of them that would get them into Stark Tower all the time and the ‘shop whenever Tony himself was there and wasn’t in ‘blackout mode’. Spider-Man began to gush about a project he wanted to work on, and Kamala was raving about the chance to take a peek into the mind of Tony Stark.

In the moment though, he heard almost none of it. He felt sort of numb all over, with tingles of heat and cold occasionally dancing over his skin in turn. To the best of his knowledge, Tony hadn’t invited anyone into the workshop since he’d come back. Well, Rhodes and Vision could get in, and he assumed Ms. Potts had access as well for work-related issues. But no other Avenger – new or old – had been permitted to step a foot inside. Steve had staked the place out for weeks, had asked and demanded, shouted and wheedled, bribed and threatened… and Tony had kept him out.

But he’d let Spider-Man and Kamala in.

Later, while Sam was digging ceramic out of his palm from the coffee mug he’d crushed in his unfeeling grip, Steve refused to discuss it. The team was still upset with Tony, after all, and he didn’t want to add more fuel to the fire. If they knew the genius was hurting him, they’d go after him, and Steve didn’t want that.

He just wanted Tony to let him back in.

He really didn’t think that was too much to ask.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm currently dabbling in a project that I'm not sure will ever see the light of day, so I thought I'd ask if you guys were interested. I kiiiinda want to do a 'fic' of sorts that's actually made up of worksheets Bucky's therapist asks him to complete. I'm thinking like, a 'Decision Journal' that will hopefully help Bucky make choices in the future for sure, and maybe a few other assorted things thrown in from time to time. I know I had this one therapist who gave me homework all the time, and I haaated the worksheets but they were actually helpful, and I thought it might be a fun little exercise to post either here or on my Tumblr.
> 
> Thoughts on that? :D


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